- Goodnight texts
- Coffee in the morning
- TV shows that make you laugh
- Websites that help me pass the time
- Coworkers that are friends too
- Bracelet making
- Beautiful clouds
- Cocoa puffs
I haven’t written in a while I know, and apparently this is my 3 year anniversary on this site (Lucky that I randomly logged in today, eh?) so congratulations to me!
I’m not as active as I once was but I’m thankful to have this to come and write my random thoughts, even if only a few people see them it’s still a nice idea to have.
Anyways, my junior year of college is winding down, in about 2 hours I’ll have my last class of the semester and then next Thursday I’ll have my first final (with 3 then on Friday) and after that I’ll be moving out of the dorms on Saturday.
My feelings on this are quite bittersweet, as they always are at the end of the year. I’m excited to be done with work, I’m quite burnt out on school work right now and definitely need the break but once more I’ll be separated from my friends for a few months.
Like last summer, I’ll be staying up in my college town and working full-time. I’ll be moving into my own apartment this year because the dorms aren’t letting seniors return for overflow purposes. So, for the first time I’ll be completely on my own. My parents no longer provide for me in any way, I’ll have my own place, pay my own rent and as of last week I’m now paying for my cell phone as well. It’s a nice feeling but certainly a scary one.
Fortunately, making things a bit easier with all these changes, unlike last year I’ll have friends staying here with me. Six of my close friends, Sonjay, Tia, Devon, Alex, Matt and Kendra will be staying up here as well which will give me people to hang out with and will hopefully reduce my loneliness and bouts with depression that I struggle with so much when I’m alone. I do of course wish that more people from my main group I hang out with this year would be there, especially my boyfriend of course but I think it will be a good summer regardless, and I’ll still get to talk to them and hopefully see them some throughout the summer.
I’m determined to make this one a good year. It’s my last summer before I graduate, before I have to actually be an adult and such and I plan on making the most of it.
I’ll keep you updated. :)
P.S. Iron Man 3 premiere was last weekend and is ONE OF THE MOST PERFECT MOVIES I’VE EVER SEEN. And tonight is the Great Gatsby premiere! Yeah!
I have been doing really bad thus far in the semester maintaining my post on my blog every day thing like I usually do. It’s not even that I haven’t had time, it’s that I’ve been like completely unmotivated or have had no ideas on what to write about. And it’s not just in my blog, it’s like my brain is still in summer mode (Which is weird since I spent all of summer wishing it was over) and I’m not motivated to do anything in class or things either. I just want to hang out with my friends. Which is obviously bad… Oops. Hope, start working like you should.
So yeah… I apologize for my lack of posting as of late but that’s why.. Hopefully this lack of motivation will go away soon. And it’s weird too, as unmotivated as I am I currently have A’s in all my classes, so I’m actually still doing my school work correctly, but all I want to do is hang out and/or sleep.
Have a nice weekend everyone!
Dear Future Husband,
Well, it’s finally come. This afternoon, after months of longing for it I will finally be home. And by home I mean away from my family, back with my college family/friends, the people who’ve shown they actually do care. I’ve been at my parent’s house with my family this past week and it’s been the usual depressing place. I’ve again been told I’m terrible, told that I only think of myself, told that no one really loves me, all the usual stuff from my mom. This time though since it was just a week it didn’t seem as dim and dark, yes, it got me down unfortunately but God is so good. He showed me, especially two nights ago at church that in my uniqueness He can use me for His good, He loves me and accepts me and I’m valuable. I know that whoever you are out there, that He’s made it so you’ll think that way too. I don’t see how anyone could feel that way personally but I’m actually starting to believe you’re out there and that God made us to be together. I can’t wait.
I love you already.
Hope Kristen ♥
From To My Future Spouse Tumblr:
– Whomever you are, I want you. Not some perfect prince that every movie and book tells me you should be. I want the complexity that comes with a real man. I want the struggle to learn each other and the joy of discovering parts of who you are. I want to know your embrace. I want real life and all its unexpected complications that will test our relationship. I want the days when we just laugh together. I want to be able to cry while you hold me and to have water balloon wars. I want you and only you.
– “Be a best friend, tell the truth, and overuse ‘I love you’.
Go to work, do your best, don’t outsmart your common sense.
Never let your prayin knees get lazy and love like crazy.
Always treat your woman like a lady, never get too old to call her baby.
Never let your prayin knees get lazy and love like crazy.”
I want a love like this.
– You wouldn’t mind us staying in, cuddling up, and just watching Toy Story or something would you?
– Please be my Augustus Waters. You know, minus the dying.
Your very own Hazel Grace (NOOOOOOOOO!!! ALL THE FEELS!! BUT YES!! THIS EXACTLY!)
– Be a man of God. A man who shows emotion and loves me. A man who will never hurt me. But most importantly be the man I will grow old with.
– I will live my life for God. Not for a future idea that may or may not happen. I hope you do the same.
Whatever God has planned for me, He will reveal to me in His time. As He will for you.
I will not idolize you, nor fantasize about scenarios that haven’t happened nor may never happen because that’s not what God wants.
I will continue to love others as God has commanded me and I will continue to accept love.
I will live a full life of love in front of the almighty God of love.
I will be the best friend of all people that I can possibly be.
And maybe, maybe, God willing, I will have a spouse.
But I’m willing to give my all to anyone who will dance with me.
– I need you. Now. Everything seems to be falling apart. But you are the reason why I am determined to get through all of this. I love you, always.
– It’s likely that you’ll never know when something is bothering me. But I’m working on sharing myself with you. I’ll get better. I promise.
Well, since today is now officially my last day of summer before tomorrow when I move into my dorm and go home to my college town and have all kinds of crazy awesome adventures, it’s about dang time I share with you guys my summer playlist. It’s not like I at first just sat down and was like, these songs will be the soundtrack to Summer 2012 but these ended up being almost the only songs I listened to all summer, they’re just the happy, summer kind of song that is exciting to listen to as one bikes to and from work each morning in the heat and needs to get pumped up! :)
So yeah, if anyone cares (Well, it’ll be here whether you care or not actually) here is my Summer 2012 Playlist!
(These are in absolutely no order by the way.)
1. Fluorescent Adolescent – Arctic Monkeys
2. I Bet You Look Good on the Dance Floor – Arctic Monkeys
3. Sail – AWOLNATION
4. You are So Beautiful – Escape the Fate
5. Mushaboom – Feist
6. The entire “Torches” CD by Foster the People
7. The entire “Some Nights” CD by fun. AH. I’m obsessed with them right now.
8. All The Pretty Girls – fun.
9. The entire “Never Trust a Happy Song” CD by Grouplove. (Ironically most of the songs are quite happy.)
10. Ooh La – The Kooks
11. Love Me Dead – Ludo
12. Midnight City – M83
13. The entire “Overexposed” CD by Maroon 5. (I’ve never been a huge Maroon 5 CD but I’m in love with this album!!)
14. Daylight – Matt and Kim
15. Electric Feel – MGMT
16. She’s Got You High – Mumm-ra
17. Little Talks – Of Monsters and Men
18. Sleepyhead – Passion Pit
19. Lisztomania – Phoenix
20. The Way We Get By – Spoon
21. Chelsea Dagger – The Fratellis
22. Kill the Director – The Wombats
23. Vagabond – Wolfmother
24. Not exactly upbeat but the entire “Sigh No More” CD by Mumford & Sons has been on my list of always listen to for over a year now. My all time favorite CD ever.
25. I Will Wait – Mumford & Sons (Admittedly not on my list all summer because it just came out but I can’t stop listening to it!!)
Ok, I realize that my last post was a few days back and was kind of angsty, I apologize for both of those things now. My time at home hasn’t gotten a whole lot better unfortunately. I was able to hang out with a group of friends Saturday night which was fantastic. We watched random things on Netflix then went to a coffee shop where we hung out for about an hour and then a singing competition started at the coffee shop that we deeply enjoyed hearing all the performances and one of my friends that I went with, Daniel actually ended up winning the competition which was super cool! The rest of my week thus far has pretty much been me hanging out home, cleaning stuff for mom and trying to just stay under the radar as much as possible. I’m trying to be optimistic about things here and trying not to be discouraged but it’s hard, it’s been thrown around several times how I was much better when I was away from them, how I shouldn’t even be allowed to talk to people because I’m so horrible and other things that are pretty much the usual around here.
The reason I haven’t updated much on here is my parents are really not thrilled when I spend a lot of time on the computer so I’ve mostly been off it since arriving home with stolen moments here and there to check my Facebook, Twitter and Tumblr. And of course I’ve been tweeting quite often from my phone which I’ve recently started doing often to relieve my stress at times. It’s a nice way of venting out my thoughts.
I’ll be moving back into my dorm on Friday afternoon which means leaving my house Friday mid-morning, though I’ve enjoyed the few times I’ve gotten to see friends while home I’m anxiously counting the moments til I’m back at what I actually consider home in my college town. It will be quite different this year, since my whole dorm floor from last year is pretty much split up all over campus but I’m excited and looking forward to the plans God has for this year. Lots of changes which can be scary but I know the friends that matter most to be will all stick together and though our friendship won’t be as convenient as last year, it will be very prevalent still and will give us all the chance to branch out and be there for other people as well. God is good and as always have plans for the upcoming chapter of my life and though I am a bit nervous, I’m really excited to see what He’s going to do as well.
Until next time,
I admit this summer did not go exactly as I had planned, I was far more busy at work, more stressed and much more lonely than I ever imagined my first summer free from home would be. I was busier and lonelier than expected but I realize looking back now, I could have done a lot to make things better for myself. I was too angsty, stuck in my thoughts too much and too focused on how I was missing my friends that I probably missed out on some cool stuff. Fortunately, I finally allowed myself to experience new things, stay up later than I thought I should without regard to how tired I would be the next night. I’ve had some incredible times with my summer Bible study and had nights that are exactly how summer nights ought to be and once I allowed myself to do that, it was incredible.
I also finally got out of my thoughts and into trying to focus on what God wanted me to do and really allowing myself to spend more time on Him focusing on how my life should be. Now that I’ve gotten to this point I’ve decided to work on making it always like that, not wasting a second and trying to spend every second with purpose. In this next semester, it’s going to take some work to keep in touch with all my friends, we’re all spread all around campus in different dorms and some people in apartments and I realized if I keep wasting time like I have in the past, there’s no way I’ll get anything done, much less everything I want to. This year I’m going to strive to not waste a minute. I have class at 8:30 or 8:05 everyday and despite my hatred of mornings I’m going to wake up earlier than I need to so I can have my quiet time then so I can not only start my day off right but also so I make sure it gets done and that I don’t get “too busy” for my time with God. During class I’ll obviously be paying attention to that and trying to learn and for the most part I’ll be able to get the majority of my studying and homework done while at work. When I’m off work I’ve decided no more wasting time on the internet, not to say I won’t be on the internet of course but with as many friends as I have, there is way more to do than waste time on here. I have people to see! Adventures to have! I’ll probably end up staying up way too late again every night but you know what, I only live once. Why not make the most of the time I have?
I think that God wants us to do that, always try and put Him first but always live life to the very fullest.
So that’s what I want to do. :)