Things I dislike:
- The cold
- Large social settings
- Calling people
Things I love:
- Watching TV
- Being with the people I care about
- Rain and thunder
Things I am:
- Jesus Freak
- Lover of People
Things I need to remember:
- God loves me
- My friends love me
- I am worth love
- I am not terrible
- I have talents
- I can do things
I want to write things that are beautiful.
Things that inspire and encourage those around.
I want to make up worlds and languages that will be loved like the worlds I have grown up loving.
I want to have the skill and imagination of Lewis, Tolkien and Rowling.
I want to write things that make people think.
To have them ponder my words for days on end.
I want to write down the adventures I undergo and adventures I can never have.
I want to write things that are as beautiful as the things I read.
Were I to suddenly be transported into the world of superheroes, villains and awesome powers, I would most definitely want to be a superhero. Not just because of my love of justice and already wanting to be a hero by going into the field of law enforcement, but also because everyone knows that heroes get all the glory and villains never prosper. The hero I would like to be is technically one who has few to no powers, but I would like to be Marvel’s Black Widow. She is awesome, beautiful and is incredibly BA and knows how to hold her own. Not only would I want to be her in this alternate universe, but honestly, if I could trade places with any fictional character ever, it would be her. She’s beautiful, independent and has incredible fighting skills that I would kill for. All of Marvel’s heroes are people I would like to trade places with really, but Black Widow is my favorite by far.
It’s a Saturday night, 10 pm. I’m 21 years old. My 16-year-old sister is on a date with her boyfriend. Facebook is telling me two of my friends just got engaged and another couple just got married. My iTunes sings constantly of love (Because apparently people can’t talk about anything else?!) I’m sitting on my bed, in sweats, torturing myself with my favorite book that’s full of feels (The Fault In Our Stars – John Green, dang it! Why do I continuously re-read your books and let you give me so many gosh-dang feels?!?!) and wishing I had an adventure.
It’s not even that I’m so much sad right now, really, I’m doing a lot better (especially compared to earlier in the week). My situation hasn’t improved at all (In fact it might be a little worse) but somehow my attitude has but now I re-watched the Hobbit and I’m reading about people living their lives and doing things and I’m sitting here doing nothing (Not that reading is nothing, it’s my favorite but when that’s all I have to do, I want more) and I just want to go somewhere, do something new and exciting. Unfortunately I have no means of doing that or I would just get up and leave, drive somewhere even. Do something. Even nights at school where we’re not doing something exciting, I still have people to be with and being with people is always worth it and exciting and meaningful because people are the most meaningful thing there is, really, and I miss that.
I hadn’t realized before college just how much of a people person I am but I need that, that presence of other people, people to talk to, to laugh with, to just be with. I want that right now. But no, currently I’m car-less transportation-less and 98% of my friends live at least 4 hours away from me.
I feel like Belle, at the beginning of Beauty and the Beast, I want adventure in the great wide somewhere, I want it more than I can bear (That’s one reason really that I’ve always connected with Belle and why she’s always been my favorite princess, she didn’t sit around and do nothing). I want that, I want to do something, much like Augustus Waters in TFIOS, I fear oblivion. I don’t want to be forgotten, I want to be known, I want to be helpful and remembered because I did something. Not because I spent all 5 weeks of my Christmas break doing nothing, alone.
Also, quite selfishly, I want to be loved. Like Augustus loved Hazel. I know, I know it won’t happen, I know it’s not my destiny, at least for now, but I want someone to look at me like I’m beautiful, to think about me, to care about me. I want someone to look at me and think I’m worth something. I want a boy who would say, “It would be a privilege to have my heart broken by you.”
Ironically, despite my name, I’m afraid I’m quite hopeless really.
Today while browsing Tumblr, I came across a post that one of my dear friends wrote and was stunned by her brilliance, she’s younger than me but daily I learn so much from her. She’s brilliant, beautiful, not afraid to speak her mind and most of all, doesn’t care what others think about her yet she cares more about others than most people I’ve met in my life. I thought I would share her post and then share some thoughts I had about it.
I was looking for a place to let out these thoughts, then I remembered… I have a blog. Neat, huh?
Well, there’s something that I want everyone out there to remember, and that’s how important it is to take yourself seriously. No matter what your goals and dreams are, or even what you’re living right now.
Haters gonna hate.
I learned very quickly at a young age that people won’t take the poor foreign girl seriously.
So I got into fights.
As I got older I realized that the weird girl in the room won’t be taken seriously either.
Less fighting, more trouble I won’t go into too much detail with.
Through high school I started forcing my chin up because no one takes the quirkiest girl in the room as seriously as the jocks and braniacs.
And now as I’m turning 18 and about to head out into the “real world,” I realize that I was serious that whole time. Whether it was physically, socially, or just emotionally, I had to fight to be respected every day of my life. I look back now and I don’t regret one minute or mistake of it.
What made me think of all this so strongly today was going into a local clothing shop. The people working there have known me for some time as a regular customer, some longer than others on a more personal level. Those that knew me better were kind and helpful. The rest regarded me sarcastically, even remarking about my “different” look, and providing no help in my search for decently-priced clothing items. It took me a minute to keep from getting too emotional, to be honest. Just because of the sheer disrespect.
I’ve always been the one with a “different” look. The one who chose to wear big glasses, got the brightest colors possible on her braces, never covered up her freckles with bronzer, and has a new, brighter hair color every 6 weeks or so.
Some people never question why.
And honestly, that’s become fine with me, because of two reasons:
1. If they aren’t willing to ask, they won’t take away any lessons from the stories.
2. They’ll hear the stories in my books/interviews/films anyway.
My name is Anna Charlotte-Marie, Charls for short, and sometimes Charli by very special people. I was born into extreme post Cold War poverty in the heart of Riga, Latvia. I am now living in America, and striving to become a visionary like none my generation has seen.
My mediums are photography, film, fashion, words, and art.
I want to hear your story. ~ http://itscharls.tumblr.com/
Ok, so obviously Anna is amazing and honestly if I could be anyone in the world it would be her, she is flawless and amazing. Ok, anyways, to actually get onto the point, we all have a story and all of us (Some like me and Anna more than others) are unique and don’t always fit in but who wants to do that anyways? Who wants to fit in when we can stand out and change the world? Why would we want to sit around doing nothing just drudging through everyday life without anything exciting ever happening? I want to stand out. I want to continue to be my unique, awkward, self even when people judge me for it. I have a story and so do you, and like Anna, I want to hear your story too.
As you all know by now, there are several things that I love with all of my heart, two of those things are of course fictional characters and Doctor Who. So I decided to do some posts regarding why I love specific fictional characters and why they mean what they do to me.
Today’s post (As is obvious I hope by the title) is about the Doctor and why I love him as much as I do.
With the new season of Doctor Who starting up recently and with it getting closer to the Pond’s final episode, I’m getting more and more emotionally invested in this show. Anyways, not the point.
The point here is how much I love the Doctor. Now I figure that’s a pretty obvious character to love, I mean, he’s brilliant, funny, saves the world in each episode, what’s not to love right? (Unless of course you’re a Dalek.) But my love for the Doctor goes deeper than that, I love him in his bad times too, the times when he’s hurt and sad and lonely and angry but not only do I love him for those things, I can connect to him more than I can with a lot of other fictional characters. Obviously I can’t connect on a complete level, I’m not a brilliant alien who saves the world, and I haven’t destroyed races and planets, but when the Doctor, especially the 11th Doctor is being ridiculous, it’s reminiscent of what I do. Most of the times, he’s the most ridiculous person ever, making everyone smile, going out of his way to help people and causing random shenanigans but when you really look into his character and think about it, he’s not always that happy, sure, sometimes he is but some of the times, I think he acts that way because if he’s not acting ridiculous, he’ll be so incredibly sad and lonely that he honestly can’t stand it. Some people don’t understand that feeling but I do completely. People who know me in real life, people who just know me on the surface, would probably say those things about me, that I’m ridiculous and caring and would do anything for others, those things are all true and I really am one of the most ridiculous people around, but sometimes I am ridiculous for those same reasons, because the hurt and loneliness will catch up to me otherwise, I have to be ridiculous, or else I’ll be incredibly sad.
And that, along with countless other reasons is why I not only love the Doctor with my whole heart but why I can also connect to him, because I understand him.
A year ago today, was the day I woke up early because I couldn’t wait for the evening’s activities. It was the day my group of friends and I got to the IMAX movie theater at 4 in the afternoon fully knowing we couldn’t go inside til 11pm. The 115 degree heat didn’t bother us, the emotions did. This was it, the last time we would all gather together and go see the adventures of Harry, Ron and Hermione. It was the day we would always remember, the movies and the saga that had forever changed our lives for the better. A year ago today we made pumpkin cookies, butterbeer and were on the news several times because of our insanity at being out in that extreme heat for some long. A year ago today was the day that we all dressed up as the characters who meant the most to us, to the characters that taught us to be brave, to be strong and to never forget what’s important and to fight for that, no matter the cost. A year ago today marked the end of the new Harry Potter movies, it was the last one and that left us very emotional and sad but we were gonna be ok, because the magic will never end. Not truly, as JK Rowling stated at the premiere in England last year, “Hogwarts will always be there to welcome you home.”