I wish I knew how to love myself. I wish I knew how to stop loving him.
It’s weird, knowing things objectively – like, we don’t belong together, this break up is for the best, I’m worthy of love because Jesus loves me, things like that, but not being able to truly know them. I don’t see anything good in myself – I really never have and I want to but don’t know how to begin.
It’s a month today – I’m sitting in my room eating ice cream and crying. This week will actually be good, I have a lot of plans and things will be good. Right now- 11pm by myself, this is not good. I want healing to be easier. I want to be the person God wants me to be and I wish I knew how to do all of those things.
Growing up and having a broken heart is so much harder than one would imagine.