The Clock Strikes Twelve
Any of my long time readers know that I started watching Doctor Who in the Spring of 2011. Most of you, long time reader or not, know that Doctor Who is the most important thing in my life after God and my friends. It’s been there to comfort me, to make me laugh, make me cry, even make me angry.
When I first starting watching, I watched new Who, watching from Eccleston to Smith circa series 5 in less than a month. I ate it up. Then it happened, I caught up. On April 16, 2013, I finished series 5 and had to go from watching 5 episodes a day, to having to wait a week, til the 23rd for the opener to series 6 – “The Impossible Astronaut.”
I’ve loved all 3 Doctor’s I’ve seen – Eccleston with his sass, Tennant with his intelligence, his beautiful, heartfelt acting and everything else about him. I cried as Ten regenerated and told myself I wouldn’t be able to love anyone like I loved him. I was right, I didn’t love anyone like I loved Ten, but immediately starting the Eleventh Hour, I fell in love with Matt. With his childlike wonder, his silliness, how sometimes you can believe he is so, so old, all the ways he cares about everyone he comes into contact with (Both in real life and as the Doctor come to think of it), Matt is my Doctor.
He was my first really, the first Doctor I waited a week, several weeks or often times months for the next episode. Matt’s the one I’ve spent the most time seeing, the most time I’ve spent falling in love with. Yes, Eccleston and Tennant are wonderful and are so very much the Doctor but Matt, Matt Smith is mine. He is the one I care about the most, the one I relate to the most – how he has fun and acts excited about everything, but sometimes, often the reason he acts so ridiculous is to cover the sadness, to forget everything from his past, to distract himself from the people he’s lost. I understand that feeling so well.
But more than that, the Eleventh Doctor cares, “900 years of Time and Space and I’ve never met anyone who wasn’t important.” The Eleventh Doctor has given my life more meaning, he’s made me realize how important I am, how even though caring often ends in pain – it’s worth it for the time you do have those people.
This Sunday, the Twelfth Doctor will be announced. BBC is having a special where Matt and Moffat will be talking about Doctor Who and letting us all know who’s coming next. We still have two episodes with Matt of course, but I’m already in tears just thinking of it, yes, it’s time, yes, this is the nature of the show and I know that I will fall in love with the new Doctor immediately. The Doctor is the same man always but Matt will always be MY Doctor. He will have that spot in my heart.
Obviously, this will be the first time I’ve witnessed the regeneration live, and trust me, on Christmas Day I will be a complete emotional wreck all day but this is also the first time I’ve gotten to be part of the hype, to see it build up. From hearing Matt announce that he was leaving, to seeing videos of him breakdown at Comic Con, saying he had made a mistake, begging people not to forget him.
It’s been a beautiful 4 years, I’ve loved every second of it and quickly you became the Doctor closest to my heart. You’ve made me laugh, cry and feel I could be a hero. I’m not ready for you to go but I know you feel it’s your time. Since that is the way the show works, I’m looking forward to who will be next but I’ll miss you and you will always be in my heart.
You were fantastic. Bow ties have never been cooler.
Raggedy man, goodbye.
Dear Matt Smith,
Hello, old friend, and here we are, you and us, on the last page. By the time you read these words, your time as the Doctor will be done. So know that we understand and are supportive of your decision. And above all else, know that we will love you, always.
Sometimes we do worry about you, though. We think once you’re gone, you won’t be coming back to Doctor Who for a while and that you might be sad, which you should never be.
Don’t be sad, Matthew.
And do one more thing for us. There’s whole fandom waiting in anticipation for our next Doctor. They’re going to wait a long while, so they’re going to need a lot of hope.
Go to them.
Tell them that if they’re patient, the days are coming that they’ll never forget. Tell them they’re going to see new planets and run from aliens. They’ll fall in love with a man that chose to carry on the legacy of being the Doctor. Tell them they’ll give hope to other fandoms and bring a whole new generation into the family that is Doctor Who.
Tell them this is the journey of the Eleventh Doctor. And this is how it ends.