I Hate Writing About My Angst
I hate being sad. I hate that I don’t remember how to feel happy. I hate that everyone I’m friends with eventually leaves or finds someone better. I wish I could stop caring because my caring only seems to push people away. I wish I knew how to turn off all my feelings so I could stop hurting and hurting others.
I hate writing on here about how sad I am but sometimes I have to get it out. I don’t know what I do wrong most of the time with friendships but I clearly do something because almost everyone leaves. It hurts me but I hate hurting other people more than I hate being hurt.
But now, now I can’t remember how to be happy. The pain of everyone leaving is getting to me and I miss them. I miss the person who was my closest friend in the world, I ruined everything, I scared him off like I scare off everyone. And now I don’t know what to do.